Reading For Treasure: An End of the Year Digital Grab Bag!

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles (and other readings) that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

Since we are all sending so much time on our digital devices, here is a grab bag of articles to make both your online and offline life safer, healthier, and better.

If you use an iPhone, it is time to retire those old “in case of emergency” designations in favor of the phone’s built-in emergency contacts. You can make any contact an emergency contact by editing it and selecting “emergency contact.” In addition, this article from Apple World goes one step further and explains “How to Send Your Medical ID to First Responders in an iPhone Emergency Call.” During a pandemic, this seems like a feature to activate. 

Many of us are spending hours and hours on our devices. If these devices break or lose our data, we may have significant problems. That is why it is critical to back up everything – and I mean everything. Wired Magazine has a good overview of this: “How to Back Up Your Digital Life.” If your answer to “what would happen if your computer crashed?” Is that you would be up the creek, consider reading this and backing up everything! Remember, you probably want to back up your phone, too! 

Often the weakest link in your digital armor is your password. Some of us use the same password all the time. Some of our passwords are easy to guess, even if you don’t know us well. Some of us have answered quizzes or done those Facebook questionnaires and shared the answers to every possible security question with the world. The key to good passwords is making them long and complex, but that means they are difficult to remember (and to crack). The key to making long passwords usable is a good password manager. I use 1Password, but there are many to choose from. Here is an Engadget article to get help you start using one: “It’s time to start using a password manager: Here’s how”

Finally, two good pieces from one of my favorites, Lifehacker. First and most important, “Never Email Your Social Security Number, I Am Begging You.” The title says it all, but I will add this: please think of any unencrypted email (which is probably all of our emails) as a postcard, not a letter. There is no envelope and anyone on all the systems it passes through (and there are many) could look at it. 

Finally, since we are sitting in front of screens all the time, we need to protect our necks, backs, wrists, eyes, and the rest of our bodies. Lifehacker also provided a good guide to make sure that you are not making yourself sick by the way you are using your computer: “How to Ergonomically Optimize Your Workspace”

I am currently reading The Peripheral by William Gibson

VHS Time Capsule

Staying at home during the time of COVID has provided me with time to start to clean out all those old things stored in the basement. My family and I have thrown things away, packed up things for donations, and done a ton of recycling. 

Recently, we pulled four huge bins of VHS tapes out of the crawl space. In them were hundreds of recordings of Star Trek and other television shows I adore. I remember watching the first run of each series with a remote in my hand to edit out the commercials. I was certain that these tapes were going to be the way I got to watch these shows again. 

I had carefully labeled every tape. Each one had a list of the episodes inside the cover. I really felt like I was preparing my future viewing. I did not predict streaming services or DVDs. I no longer even own a video cassette player of any kind. 

So why is it so difficult to part with these tapes? 

It is not as if I am going to sit down and use the tapes, even though I do continue to watch much of the content that is on them. I don’t need old grainy analog tapes to do it. For several of the series, I have purchased DVDs that include closed captions and special features. 

The eldest of the tapes date back to the early 80s. My family was one of the last to purchase a VHS machine. I had been recording Star Trek on audiocassettes because listening was the only way I had to experience an episode other than when it was broadcast. So when that first VHS deck came into my house, there was no doubt what I was recording. 

I knew that the episodes I was recording were edited. I was aware that they had a few minutes cut from them for additional commercials, but at the time, there was no alternative. Even when I could purchase store-bought tapes of the episodes (which I did), they were expensive and I bought them slowly and savored each one. 

As I got older, these became my exercise tapes. I would watch them to make working out interesting and take my mind from the sweat and discomfort of riding a stationary bicycle at 5 in the morning. I still watch Star Trek while working out! 

I bought my own VHS recorder as a gift to myself for my college graduation. Star Trek: The Next Generation was being made and I recorded entertainment shows and tried to find any clip or glimpse of information about this new Trek. 

When the show finally premiered, I made sure that I was in front of the TV, remote in hand, for every episode. I recorded each one twice: once with commercials edited out and one with them left in. I am a big believer in backups. 

I did this for a very long time. 

I recorded The Next Generation, Deep Space Nine, The Original Series, and the Animated Series on these tapes. By the time Voyager and Enterprise premiered, my life had become too complex to edit them live. But now I had a host of other shows: Babylon Five, Earth Final Conflict, Farscape, Alien Nation, and even some I had forgotten (remember Seven Days?).  I have not rewatched all of these series, although as I write about them, I am eager to find the services that stream them, even if I don’t know when I will have time to watch all I would want to. 

I know that these tapes are not the way I will now see these shows. I know that there is no problem with throwing them away or recycling them. But doing so feels like losing something special; something that feels both far away and very dear and important. They are a kind of time portal into a distant past which I don’t want to lose. 

The technology may be obsolete, but the feelings and attachments are not. These tapes are mementos of watching these shows broadcast for the very first time. They are relics of a distant time, heavy relics that are taking up lots of space in my basement. Unlike my affections for these shows, basement space is not infinite. I am going to have to come to terms with letting go of these tapes and being content with the feelings they engender when I watch what was on them. 

The tapes did not record my wonder, joy, and delight in these stories and sagas. Those can never be lost! 

To Open Schools or Not To Open Schools

That is the question. It is a fiery debate in my community and across the nation and the world. The largest school districts in the United States have gone fully remote. Communities with under 3% infection rates are closed, but others with 50% rates are open! Some European schools are open, but Israeli schools look like they are about to close. Evidence suggests that younger children may not spread the infection like older students, but concerns for staff members, who are often older, makes navigating in-person schooling extremely challenging. 

And then there is another argument: remote learning is uneven at best and remote learning disadvantages the most vulnerable students. However, you roll the data, whatever proof you provide about the dangers (or lack of them) of bringing children back into school, blaming teachers’ ability to teach remotely is not only the weakest rationalization but also a gross oversimplification of the problem. Some classes and teachers are doing a fantastic job with remote learning, while others continue to struggle. Why? Schools and classrooms are systems; the teacher is only one piece of that picture. 

The devil is in the details. 

With rising infection rates in most communities, it is difficult to argue that bringing people of any age together is a good idea right now. The logistics of having a percentage of students rotate through in-person classes have also proven problematic. Teachers in many districts are teaching a handful of students in their classrooms and the rest online. For many of these, what this really means is teaching all of them online, but some of them online in person. Is that better? Many students in these districts would prefer to be on their computers without their masks at home, rather than sitting in school doing the same thing. 

There is also the schedule question: Some schools have to change students' teachers and schedules in order to balance the numbers in each class of students who are coming in with those who are staying home. Is it worth changing teachers, times, and even courses so that students can be in the building? I can hear the complaints now, “Yes, I want my child in school, but she has to still be in Mr. Green’s class!” 

Then there is the piece that is so contentious that no one wants to touch it: even if we make schools completely safe and infection-free, what happens in the community may sabotage our precautions. On one of my many walks, I chatted with a neighbor who is a medical doctor. Although he would like to see his kids in school, he is aware of parties and gatherings going on in the community that are dangerous and defy safe practices. We may seal the schools, but the community creates leaks! 

I have seen evidence of this as I walk the neighborhood: gatherings of bikes in driveways, groups of cars picking up and dropping off at homes, and backyard parties. Some of the parents and children are wearing masks, but often they are not. 

Learning is a social and emotional experience. Anxious people don’t function well. They don’t learn or teach well. People do not thrive in stressful situations. Even if you say, just bring in those students and staff who are okay coming in, that has problems, too. We need specific numbers of certain people to come in or school doesn’t work. What if we get too many of some and not enough of others? The math teachers will come in, but the science teachers won’t. We don’t have enough custodians, secretaries, technology staff – you get the idea. How does that help? Should the burden be placed only on a few? 

Kids need to be in school. Teachers want to be in school. Right now, it is a knot we are unable to untangle. School staff should be at the front of the line to receive vaccines. Will those screaming for schools to open support closing everything else (bars, restaurants, gyms, stores, etc.) and abide by a lockdown order? That is how Europe opened schools! Can we trust our neighbors to play by the rules? 

Only once community transmission of this illness falls and staff and students are protected, can schools can. Americans don’t seem to be willing to make the trade-offs to open them any sooner. 

Reading For Treasure: After the Election

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles (and other readings) that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

Here are a few articles dealing with the aftermath of the election: 

This is an interesting opinion piece from the Chicago Tribune that explores the idea of bias through the relationship of a woman and her granddaughter to the flowers and trees: Commentary: “What my granddaughter (and my begonias) taught me about bias.”  

A former student of mine is one of the rabbis who authored this commentary from The Forward: “A rabbinic call to uphold truth and democracy.” In it, these rabbis say that acknowledgment of truth of this election “is no longer a partisan issue. It is a moral issue.” 

This very personal piece from CNN by Richard Eldredge addresses the family splits over politics: “To my family who chose Trump over me: Was it worth it?” To fully understand his point of view and the power of this piece, you will need to read it all the way to the end. 

Although older, this article from The Atlantic may help put Eldredge’s split with his relatives in perspective. “Why Trump Supports Can’t Admit Who He Really Is” argues that Trump represents the only defense against a catastrophic radical transformation of America to his supporters and thus they will overlook anything and everything about him. 

Finally, two pieces of satire: McSweeny’s “To The Enemies Surrounding Our Castle, Please Understand That I Often Privately Disagreed With Macbeth’s Policies” speaks in the voice of one of the murderers from Shakespeare’s Macbeth who wants us to know that, even though he helped Macbeth, now that Macbeth has been overthrown, he really did not support the horrible things that Macbeth did. The Onion’s article, “Anti-Jacketers Rally Outside Burlington Coat Factory To Protest Liberal Cold Weather Conspiracy” makes the mask argument beautifully! 

Currently, I am rereading John Scalzi’s Redshirts. 

Without Reason and Rationality, There is No Responsibility

“I didn’t cheat!” 

The student is not looking me in the eyes, “I wrote that. Those are my words. It is just a coincidence that they were similar to another source. I never saw that source. I came up with that paragraph, just like someone else did.” 

Plagiarism was my least favorite student issue. It came in many flavors. Some students took things from the internet and passed them off as their own. Some used quotations or parts of published sources. Others would try to pass off another student’s work as original. Most of the time, their parents made no attempt to defend them. Most of the time, these students came clean and admitted what they had done. 

When they owned their mistake and when their parents stood beside me in holding them accountable, we moved forward. They learned a lesson. I never ever called a parent or sat down with a student to talk about this issue unless I was 100% certain that what they had turned in was not their own. There were times I suspected. There were times I had evidence, and there were times I advised students that what they had written was too close to another source. 

When I confronted a student and their family, I knew what had happened. I knew that they knew it, too. If the student denies what they had done or their parents look at the theft of the writing and excuse it, the student is reduced back to that child inventing excuses for the broken vase. It turns a teenager into a toddler and their parents into patsies. 

If students’ behavior doesn’t matter, if their choices have no effect or consequence, then they really are children. If students cannot be held accountable for their errors and misdeeds, then their successes and achievements are meaningless. They are ineffectual, lame, and impotent. When parents find excuses for their children’s behavior or try to reason it away, their failure to deal with the reality comes at the cost of their own integrity and their child’s growth.  

Similarly, when we don’t like the reality of a situation, we may sometimes find logical or probably fantasies that replace the bad news we wish to avoid. We have all done it. We rationalize away things we don’t want to accept. We find soothing excuses that feel better than the harsh facts that we want to wipe away. 

A rationalization isn’t a reason. It is an excuse. It is thinking one’s way out of dealing honestly with an unpleasant truth. It is a thin imitation of reason, a shadow lacking the substance of the truth. It is a childish strategy of pretending what you want to believe is true. 

And it frees us from doing what needs to be done. It forgives us, lets us off the hook, and gives us phony peace of mind that, at least temporarily, staves off the guilt of lying to ourselves. We are not responsible. We are victims. We didn’t do anything wrong. 

There is nothing new or shocking about avoiding responsibility. There is nothing revolutionary about putting on blinders to avoid seeing what is in front of us and escaping into an imaginary world of  “what ifs” and “that might not be true” and “someone else is to blame.”  

Without honestly and accurately facing the truth, we avoid responsibility for our actions. That is what denial is all about. Without looking at ourselves critically and as dispassionately as we can, we cannot own our errors and learn from them. Without “fessing up” and learning to acknowledge and own the bad as well as the good, we cannot move forward to repair our relationships, learn from our errors, and be better people. 

The denial of the truth, the failure to accept responsibility, and the refusal to think critically rob us not only of our adulthood but also of the two of the most important parts of our humanity: reason and responsibility.

Prayer to the People

Fellow citizens of this great country

Built on hope and horror

Liberty and inequality

Invention and detention 

Arise now in these difficult days 

And illuminate the world with the depth of your decency  

Fellow citizens of this tortured land

Who struggle daily 

With illness, violence, and questions of truth

Lean into the wisdom of good books and good people 

Love your neighbor and

Bring the fairness that can only come 

From just us 

Oh, beautiful Americans, 

Obey your better natures 

Not despots or desperation

Care for the desperate and dispirited

Choose goodness and generosity

Open your arms wide 

Embrace each other 

And the future 

I Still Believe That Americans Are Good At Heart

Anne Frank wrote, “In spite of everything I still believe that people are really good at heart.” 

I believe that Americans want what is best for the country and that a vast majority can see beyond their own parochial interests. I believe that most Americans are kind, compassionate, and empathetic. I believe they want the truth and are upset by those who would manipulate, lie, or deceive them. In spite of everything, I still believe that Americans have their country’s best interests at heart. 

Now, more than ever, it is difficult to argue that Americans are people of integrity and generosity. Racism, anti-Semitism, and hatred are growing. Rather than helping their neighbors, we see pictures of people flaunting common sense and endangering themselves and others. How could I say that these people are good at heart? 

The past months have been extremely difficult. Some of us have borne those challenges more than others. Some of us have taken more precautions than others. Some of us have faced the dangers directly and others have provided support. Some of us have ignored, denied, or defied the recommendation of scientists trying to contain this pandemic. 

We are afraid. We fear that we will get sick or those we care about will get sick. We long for a return to our lives before the arrival of coronavirus. We want to plan again. We want to leave our homes. We want to hug and touch again. We want to feel some kind of control. It is so frightening to feel out of control. Yet, we don’t all have the same response to this situation. 

When someone is drowning, they will cling to anything that is thrown to them. They are desperate. An anvil or a life preserver? A boat or a bomb? People in crisis don’t make measured choices or thoughtful decisions. They react instinctively. They are guided not by thought, but by feeling and instinct. They are not their best selves. 

While we may be tempted to rush to judge our neighbors and friends who are making different choices, I urge us to stop and consider: how can we best help them and the community? What can we do to ensure that people who are drowning are given boats and life preservers? What can we do to the stop the hate and start the healing, even before there is a vaccine? How can we be agents of positivity and well being? 

The first step is to see our fellow Americans for what they are: frightened and frustrated, grasping for whatever might help them stay afloat. If that means denying the reality in front of them or demonizing people who look different, it might be because they can’t tell a boat from a bomb. 

I am not excusing the hatred, racism, sexism, and cruelty. It is wrong. It isn’t going away any time soon, but it must stop and our racist structures must change. It would be helpful to have more of us on board with this idea. I believe, deep at heart, most of us share the idea that everyone should be treated fairly both under the law and beyond it. 

Which leads us to the key question. Those folks, those people without masks, spewing hate, believing absurd fantasies, and pushing us further into a dark age, what would ever convince them to treat everyone fairly? I don’t know. I know that “discussions” on social media don’t seem to do anything but further reinforce the ideas we already have. 

Compassion, empathy, listening, loving, kindness, caring, and integrity are not weapons, but tools by which our behavior can actively show “them” that there is another path. We can love our neighbor, even when our neighbor is working very hard to be hateful. 

It is not going to be easy. I don’t know who will win this election, but we will need to heal each other. I hope our leaders will help us do that, but I am not going to wait or depend on them. 

I am proud to be an American. This is my country and I am committed to helping make it the best it can be for everyone. My arms are open wide enough to embrace our diversity and disagreement. We can be united even if we are not in agreement.

May I Talk To The Younger You?

Dear Distant Friend, 

While our connection has not been that strong recently, know that I pay attention to your posts on social media and your comments elsewhere. I am thinking of you and wishing you well. 

I don’t know the present you that well. I knew an older version. It is that person in the past, that child, that young adult, to whom I’d like to talk today. May I? Would you put that earlier you on the line? 

My memories of you as a young person are clear. I found you likable and engaging. More than that, I recall that you had strong feelings. You fought against unfairness! You complained about teachers or other adults who didn’t treat kids well. Your cry of “that’s not fair” was far more than most people your age. Sometimes, you would stand up for someone and, I could tell, sometimes the price was too high. You wanted to come to their defense, but couldn’t. 

You really got upset if you thought people were not being truthful or entirely truthful to you – especially adults you trusted. I remember that you struggled when you wanted to defend a friend who got in trouble for lying, but you were also angry with them. You knew that truth and trust go hand and hand. You did not desire trust so much that you allowed yourself to be taken advantage of like other kids, who just went along with the crowd. If you didn’t feel safe, if you didn’t trust, if you didn’t believe you were being told the truth, you went your own way. I admired that about you and tried to be that way myself. 

Our friends are reflections of ourselves. I remember hearing about how you did some friendship reorganization. Did I get that term from you? Did you coin that? Was it in music class where you sang a song that said, “a man is judged by the company he keeps?” You struggled to find friends who treated you well; who would be the same with you when it was just the two of you as they would be after school or on the bus. 

And as you were going through that friendquake, I saw the kind, compassionate, and empathetic side of you. Is that part of you still there? I hope it is. I remember how you reached out to folks who needed a hand. How you did little things that were gentle and thoughtful for both your peers and others. I knew that you cared if I wasn’t feeling good or if someone was struggling or hurting. You didn’t make a show of it, and I am sure some people might have missed it, but it caught my attention when you showed it to me. Your empathy, on an occasion that I still find painful, was something I still treasure and is one of my strongest links to you. 

The reason I am writing to your younger self is that I need those aspects of you now. I need the strengths you developed long before many of the rest of us did. Frankly, all of us need you now. We need people who value truth and trust, want strong and steady friends, are kind, compassionate, and thoughtful. I want to live in a world, in a country, of people like you, who have strong values and really live them out. We need people who aren’t selfish but give to others; we need people who demand the truth and then act on it. We need people who want fair and honest dealings for everyone! 

I don’t know if that younger self can write me back. Is that an unfair request? I am just asking for a glimpse, a moment, or even a reawakening of the parts of you that drew me to you so long again when you were young and I was - younger. 

We are living in an unsteady world. We are experiencing a civilization-quake. The company we keep, the choices we make, the values we hold will determine whether we grow and thrive, or get sick and fall apart. 

I still trust that younger you. I hold that younger you close to my heart especially this coming week, this election. 

Thank that person for me. Thank you for being that person and thank you for reading this too long letter. I needed to write it to remind myself that people like you are out there. 

My resolve is back. I know what I must do. 

Thank you for guiding me there, 

Your Friend 

Reading For Treasure: Before The Election:

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles (and other readings) that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

How can we tell what is “real” or “fake” news? For most of us, our social media feed is primarily populated with opinions similar to ours. Wired’s article, “How to Break Out of Your Social Media Echo Chamber” provides some good suggestions about how to change our use of Facebook, Twitter, and other online sources so we can get a more balanced and complete picture of our world – not just a confirmation of what someone thinks we want to hear.

A second Wired article explores the problem of fake news, specifically the use of deep fake videos. How can we recognize news sources designed to fool us? Maybe, “America Needs A Ministry of Truth.” The author explains that this is not going to be the same as the one in Orwell’s 1984, but more along the lines of the EPA, FDA, or other agencies that protect the public. As I read this, I thought about a media Underwriters Laboratory; an independent agency that puts their stamp of approval on information. Regardless, we are soon going to need help separating the fact from deep fake.

The great scientist Carl Sagan wrote about “The Fine Art of Baloney Detection” and provided some very specific advice in his book, The Demon-Haunted World. His route to critical thinking has been the subject of several articles, including “The Baloney Detection Kit: Carl Sagan’s Rules for Bullshit-Busting and Critical Thinking” from brainpickings. The article summarizes his rules and provides Sagan’s take on logical fallacies as well. If you are interested, here is the complete chapter of the book.

While a lawn sign may tell which of your neighbors supports which candidates, Lifehacker provides us with tools that let us “See Who Has Donated to a Political Campaign With These Tools.” If we want to avoid the echo chamber or make certain that a source is being sincere in support, it might be good to know if they put their money there, too.

Two articles answer the question I hear a great deal, “how could THEY believe this stuff?” Medium’s “Why Your Christian Friends and Family Members Are So Easily Fooled By Conspiracy Theories” and the Independent’s “I grew up in rural, small-town America – and I can tell you the real reason why people love Donald Trump.” While not entirely unbiased, they do give a glimpse into these specific points of view.

The Washington Post recommends, “Stop fretting about Trump and do something about it. Right now.” This article is good advice regardless of your political leanings. It is basically a guide to how to check your voter registration and make sure you can vote - and get others to vote!

I am currently reading The Regional Office is Under Attack by Manuel Gonzales.

Vote with Integrity

Recent events have made me think about integrity. Merriam-Webster provides three definitions:

 

1. firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values: incorruptibility.

2. an unimpaired condition: soundness.

3. the quality or state of being complete and undivided: completeness

 

Do I do this? Am I a person of integrity?

 

Can I articulate the code that guides my behavior? Is it an external code, like the Ten Commandments, the Constitution, or some other written set of rules? Have I created my own set of values by which I evaluate my choices?  One can’t be incorruptible if there is nothing to corrupt! What are my guiding values and where do they come from?

 

Is my condition sound? Is my behavior “free from flaw, defect, or decay?” Is it “solid,” “firm,”  “secure,” and “stable?” Do I work to make sure my decisions are “free from error, fallacy, or misapprehension?” Are they “based on thorough knowledge and experience” and “legally” and “logically valid?” Do I show sound and “good judgment or sense?”

 

Am I complete? Is my integrity complete? Do I have all the information and “necessary parts, elements, or steps?” I am being “thorough,” and “proficient?”

Who are people of integrity? How do I know?

 

Some people say one thing and then do another. We call them hypocrites. Others say one thing and then renounce their values when they are no longer convenient or easy. We call them opportunists. Others discard their values when they stand in the way of material or political goals. You probably know what they might be called.  

 

Yet, it can be appropriate to alter one’s values. Can that be done without compromising one’s integrity? We learn. We grow. We change with condition and time. The rules that guided us at four, fourteen, or forty are different. We should not be so rigid or simple to think that the same set of rules will always guide our choices.

 

Or should we? The Ten Commandments don’t change. Perhaps some of our values are unchanging and others need to adapt to current circumstances. How do we know the difference?

 

Does integrity have some basic foundational precepts? Are there some straightforward and direct values that we may bind to our hands, heads, and hearts?

Try these on for a start:  

• Tell the whole truth; be honest.

• Keep your promises and fulfill your obligations.

• Do no harm to others in tangible or intangible ways.

• Actively help those in need.

• Nurture children; support elders.

• Work with other people collaboratively and with their consent.

There are some tools that are necessary to “adhere” to a “code” and remain “sound.”

• I must be able to think critically and reason logically and dispassionately.

• I must be able to tell truth from falsehood –and fact from opinion.

• I must be aware of my desires and how they might affect my thinking and feeling.

• I must listen to others and be able to accept and understand their points of view. 

• I must be able to evaluate others’ points of view dispassionately and with as little bias as possible. I must be aware of that bias and its effects.

• My emotions and my reason must be in concert. While I may have a “gut” feeling, I must pair such feelings with consideration.

• I must acknowledge my own fallibility and own my mistakes when I inevitably make them – and then work to correct them!

Integrity is an active process and more than a state of being. It is a worthy goal. As we go to the ballot box, let us be voters and citizens of integrity.

When You Vote...

When you vote, don’t be a single-issue voter. The selection of a president of the United States is far too important and complex to be made by a single measure. Instead, please consider the following. 

When you vote: 

Think of this as a hiring decision. Which candidate would you want in your organization? Which one would you trust to run your business? How do you choose a person to join your department or company? If these were the final choices, which one would you offer the job? 

Imagine your child was marrying into this person’s family. Which one would you want as a possible new in-law? Which one would best treat your child well, as they enter the new family? 

Think about those who are unfortunate and in difficult circumstances. Think about those whose lives are on the edge and in jeopardy. Which of these people will do the most to help these people? Which of these people can you trust to protect the weakest and most vulnerable among us? 

Imagine you will be this person’s boss and you will be held to account for their actions. Which candidate is likely to make you proud? Which one is more likely to embarrass or disappoint you? If you were to be blamed for this person’s actions, which one would be more likely to cause you grief, pain, or problems? 

Think about your parents as they age and the needs of our increasing older population. Which of these candidates understands the struggles and challenges of aging in America. Which one understands what it means to care for older adults? 

Think about our children and their wellbeing. There is nothing more important than the investment we make in our kids – all of our kids. Which person will set the standard and be the example we want our children to follow? Which will protect and educate them?

Think about our environment. Last year was the second warmest year on record. We had floods, earthquakes, tornados, hurricanes, wildfires, droughts, and an increasing number of natural disasters. Which of these people will work toward healing our planet? 

Consider the candidate’s morals and ethics? Which of these people do you trust more? Who behaves in a way that is more honest, forthright, and just? Who demonstrates integrity? 

Consider the idea that this person must serve everyone, even those who didn’t vote for him. Can this person do this? Could this person be everyone’s president? Can this person bring us together? 

When you vote, you are all alone and no one will know for whom you voted. You could say, &*#$ it all, I am going to vote out of anger. Or you can think about what is most critical and important to you and to all of us, and vote your heart and your head. 

Your vote is a reflection of you. What are you voting for?  

Our Communities Need Us: Fulfilling Our Duty To Each Other

Dear Neighbors and Friends (near and far), 

To call this a difficult time feels like gross understatement. We are confused. We are angry. We are scared. Given the crises we are experiencing, these are normal and natural responses. What do we do with them? How do we cope? How do we help each other, and what do we do to bring our communities back to equilibrium? 

People are in pain. They are suffering physically, emotionally, and economically. Many have lost people dear to them. We cannot and should not wave away their grief. We must do what good friends, family, and neighbors have always done:  bring comfort, assistance, and the balm of companionship – even at a distance. 

No one is immune to the complex crises facing our communities. The multiple pieces of this storm have affected everyone, regardless of age, race, wealth, location, or other factors. None of us have superpowers, though we may wish we did. 

So what do we do? How can we work together to help each other and ourselves? That is the goal, right? That is the point of community. If we needed no one else, we could live by ourselves on an island. We are part of a greater interdependent whole: our communities. They give to us and we contribute to them. It is a mutually beneficial relationship  - at least most of the time. 

Sometimes, however, we are at odds with members of our communities. We disagree. We see the balance between giving and taking differently. We advocate for diverse priorities. If these differences are large enough, they may be transformative: they alter the fabric of our shared relationship. 

When in conflict, it can be tempting to simplify the disagreement: It is us or them, our way or their way, one or two, up or down. When we are highly invested in our communities and our positions, it can be very difficult to listen, arrive at compromise, and separate our feelings of ego and ownership from our thoughts about what is best for our community. Our strong feelings cloud our better judgment. Our communities are very important, as they should be, but we fear losing face, being wrong, seeming weak, or letting people down. Sometimes, we are angry and hurt. 

We must remind ourselves of what is most important about our communities and why they exist. When we demonize others because they take different positions, we need to remember our common objectives. 

What are they? Let’s take some of them out and use them to put our disagreements in perspective: 

Some of the reasons we sustain our communities are to: 

• Ensure the safety and well being of all, but especially those who cannot ensure their own. 
• Create resources that are valuable to most if not all of us, but so complex that we could not create them by ourselves (i.e. fire protection, hospitals, electrical grids, etc.). 
• Deal with traumatic or catastrophic threats that would overwhelm us individually. 
• Collaborate creatively to make our world a more pleasing and joyful place.   
• Collaborate economically and build shared resources that enhance the stability and comfort of our community. 
• Hold people to account and ensure that, if people’s behavior is detrimental to the community, there are ways to address and rectify it. 
• Protect and nurture our children and help them grow, learn, and mature. 
• Care for and honor our elders and ensure that they are protected and healthy. 
• Explore our community relationships and learn more about what communities mean to us. 

There are, of course, others as well. This list is not exhaustive. Feel free to leave comments with other reasons to maintain community. 

Being in a community means that we must let go of some of our individuality and individual control. We strike a balance between doing what is good for our families, communities, and what we would like to do just for ourselves. 

Small children are selfish. They cannot see this important difference. They won’t share toys, leave some of the cake for later, or give their parents quiet time to work at home. They are demanding and focused only on their own needs. Even if they have simple chores, they may chaff against doing them. They don’t recognize that they receive benefits from the family and also must learn to be an active contributor to it. 

We know people who are like this; they see only what the community gives them, should do for them, or should NOT do to them. The street only goes one way. Beyond these benefits, they want the community to allow them to eat all the dessert, stay up late, scream and yell whenever they want, and live by their own rules  - only. Toddlers can be tyrants, but so can taxpayers. 

In times of crisis, like now, it is easy to pull in our household borders and see only our immediate needs. We need toilet paper or cleanser, who cares if other people don’t have any. Who cares that our neighbors are being treated in ways that are demeaning, unjust, or dangerous if we are safe? 

More than ever, during a time when any of us can infect any of us unknowingly, we must prioritize the needs of the community.  We must listen and believe our neighbors of color and actively make our communities more equitable and just. We must unite as a community and a country to protect all of us. We must foster our connections to each other as much as we keep our households safe and healthy. 

Members of the military often talk about duty. We refer to serving on juries and voting as civic duties. If parents fail to properly take care of their children, it is criminal negligence. Our community needs us. It is our duty to care for it with the diligence that would devote to loved ones. We must balance our individual obligations with our obligations to our community and country. 

This cannot be accidental or incidental. This must be a conscious decision to do whatever we can do to make our communities safe, just, healthy, and peaceful:  

• Protect those who are struggling to keep themselves safe
• Strengthen our shared structures like hospitals and schools  (and the people who work at them)
• Comfort and assist those ailing, like the elderly and medically challenged. 
• Hold those whose behavior is racist, sexist, or prejudicial to account.
• Change structures in our community that benefit some at the expense of others.   
• Assist each other in realizing and living up to our communal duties.
• Protect and nurture all of our children.
• Help the community (both as a whole and as individuals) find joy and hope.

These are difficult goals during the best of times. They are never easy- and they have never been more important than right now. 

We must unite around fulfilling our duties to our community. We must find new balances between our own needs and what will benefit all of us. 

If we do not do this, our communities will become sick and die – and take us with them. 

Reading for Treasure: Voting Questions Answered - How to Get Your Ballot Counted!

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles (and other readings) that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

It is critically important that all eligible voters get to the polls this year. There are many ways to cast your ballot. These articles answer almost all of the questions about how to vote, where to vote, when to vote, and even how to get reliable and credible information to make a good decision.  

 

 

How to Vote in the 2020 Election from FiveThirtyEight has specific instructions about all aspects of voting: registration, timing, in-person voting, absentee and mail-in voting, and more.

 

NewsOne provides a good guide on Voting During The Pandemic: What You Should Know About Coronavirus And Casting Ballots.

 

Three Lifehacker articles cover important and very basic voting information:

 

How to Register to Vote from Lifehacker is a good starting place to not only register but to check to see if you are already registered! Some states allow you to register online or by mail, too!

 

How to Vote By Mail from Lifehacker covers registering to vote, absentee ballots and mail-in voting with some additional very useful links.

 

How To Submit Your Mail-In Ballot Without Using the USPS from Lifehacker gives you many options for casting your mail-in ballot. 

 

How to Protect Yourself From Covid-19 While Casting Your Ballot from CNN gives tips on what to do if you are going to the polling place.

 

How to Prevent Your Mail Ballot From Being Rejected from the Washington Post clearly outlines the steps you must take to ensure your vote is counted!

 

How to Find Credible Information About the Election (and Avoid Getting Duped) from Commonsense Media, although written for younger and first-time voters, reminds us of proven strategies for analyzing the veracity of our news sources. The links in this article are worth the read by themselves! This article is a master class in fact-checking!

Currently, I am reading The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet by Becky Chambers

Staying Positive about the Promise and Peril of the New School Year

Remember lining up at the school door for the first day of school? Remember the thrill of finding out who was in your class and who would be your teacher? After the bell rang, remember running to find your new locker, unloading the boxes of crayons, smocks, sharpened pencils in spiffy cases, putting fresh binders into your desk, and presenting yourself to your new teacher with a big box of tissues. The room was bright, cheerful, and greeted you warmly. You worried about making a good impression on both your classmates and teachers. You wanted this year to be the best year ever! You had been perseverating about this first day for weeks, planning outfits, spreading rumors, peeking in windows, and pinning hopes on friendships and scholarship.

 

On the first day of classes as a teacher, I was beyond anxious. I wanted that first impression, that first class session to set the perfect tone and make every child feel welcome, excited, and joyful about our journey together. I wanted to learn everyone’s name and all about them! I want them to know that this would indeed be the best year ever!

 

How difficult it must be to muster up that kind of enthusiasm this year. How much work must it take for teachers to make a computer as welcoming and warm as a classroom? Turning on a computer cannot compare to the smell of freshly waxed floors and the din of kids in hallways. Six feet and social distance can create a chasm that will take labor to bridge.  How do we discover the real people behind the masks when we never get to see a smile in person?

 

We must! We can! Parents, teachers, administrators, counselors, social workers, and all the adults in children’s lives must join together to help students discover the deeply buried joy in learning this year. It is a mammoth undertaking fighting the fear and anger, the feelings of being abandoned and betrayed, and the overwhelming wish for our old normal routine.

 

I don’t know if that school is coming back, but it is not coming back soon. School staff and parents have been pushed to the frontlines of a battle that politicians have fought with only wishes and promises.

 

Yet, here we are – on our computers, trapped in our homes, alone in our classrooms and offices, in reconfigured spaces that feel alien and cold. We have been given a few weeks to prepare. We have been threatened and bullied. We have been asked to recreate symphonies with sticks.

 

We must trust our teachers and other school staff members to do right by kids. That is why they are there. They, too, must juggle their own family needs as we return to school.

 

We must help children rediscover the joy of learning. We must partner with their teachers and school staff and find creative ways to help them sustain engagement with school.

We must partner with parents and the community and try to find ways to balance the many pressing and important pieces of our lives beyond the schoolhouse. We must not sacrifice some for others.

 

To everyone who is going back to the classroom, campus, school, or center, may this school year bring you joy and connection. Despite the distance, may your students, teachers, colleagues, and friends help you learn, grow, and discover the best in yourself and the best in them. Despite the fear and anger, may your community wrap you in protection and health. Despite the challenges, may the new school year reaffirm your noblest goals and passions, and may it transform you and therefore transform the world.

Reading for Treasure: Racist!?

 Reading for Treasure is my list of articles (and other readings) that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

 

I don’t want our focus on racial justice to vanish as the protests leave the front pages and our television screens become filled with other topics. What makes something (or someone) racist? How should we have conversations regarding race and racism? Here are some articles that ask and answer some important questions about race.

 

“When Using Racist, Define Your Terms”: This article from The Atlantic explores the different definitions of racism and then argues that people, but especially journalists, must make it very clear what they mean by that term when they use it.

“When to Call Someone Out or Call Them In Over Racist Behavior”: This excerpt from a book by Tiffany Jewel starts by differentiating between calling someone in (addressing racist behavior privately) or calling someone out (addressing it in front of others). She then presents a series of questions about the nature of the behavior and situation that can guide your choice of whether to call someone in or out.

 

“The ‘I’m not a racist’ defense”: After you point out to someone that what they said or did was racist, almost always they turn that into an accusation that they are racist. In this opinion piece from CNN, Elliot Williams urges us to look beyond the label and see that it is not the intent of actions, but their impact that really makes something racist and that apologies and denials hide that sometimes White people do things that are racist and need to both acknowledge them and then do something about them.

 

“The Difference Between Being ‘Not Racist’ and ‘Anti-Racist’”: This article from Lifehacker clearly defines the terms “racist” and “anti-racist” and provides clear examples of behavior for each. It is a quick, easy, and important read.

 

 “What Drives Support for the Alt-Right”: This article from Psychology Today reports on a study that looked at the psychological profiles of people who identified with the Alt-right movement. It describes three clear takeaways from this report and looks at what is the motivation of Alt-right, their bias, and their comparison to supports of Antifa.

 

“What We Get Wrong About ‘People of Color’”: This article from Wired was written before people began using BIPOC or (Black, Indigenous, People of Color), but I wonder if the point would be the same. The author asks if we are using POC as a euphemism to avoid naming more specific groups.

 

“Open Letter to White People”: This piece suggests that the “what can I do” response to racist events is an empty question and White people become paralyzed by it. This article, written by a White person, works to get us past that paralysis by tapping into our empathy and taking action!

 

Seeing White Podcast: While many of us are considered White, our skin color is not really White. How did the idea of White (and Black) come about? Who were the people who made this distinction and why? I am willing to bet that many of the historical events this podcast describes will be new to you (especially if you are White).  It is outstanding and I cannot recommend it highly enough. Seeing White is part of a podcast called Scene on Radio.

 

“This Presidency Has Exposed My White Christian Friends”: The title makes the focus of this blog post very clear. Written by a pastor of a large church who is shocked by the beliefs of people he thought claimed to “love Jesus.” He says that the election of the current president has given people permission to stop pretending and take off their masks (metaphorically, of course – this article was written before the pandemic).  

 

 

I am currently reading Lovecraft Country by Matt Ruff