Reading For Treasure: Education Issues

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

Earlier this month, I spent two days back at school working with teachers and librarians and talking to kids about books. It was wonderful, rejuvenating, and exhausting! One of the reasons I started this list of articles was I didn’t want to keep sending my not-yet-retired colleagues articles that I thought they would find interesting or useful. So I post them here instead. My mind is on all the different aspects of education: grading, social and emotional health, classroom practices, athletics, safety, and many other topics. Since my list is long this month, I am limiting myself to a very short description of each article.  

First, some articles that focus on teaching and the teacher experience: 

“I No Longer Grade My Students’ Work — And I Wish I Had Stopped Sooner” in Blavity. “I’ve been teaching college English for more than 30 years. Four years ago, I stopped putting grades on written work, and it has transformed my teaching and my students’ learning. My only regret is that I didn’t do it sooner.” 

“The Case Against Zeros in Grading” in Edutopia. I am shocked that some teachers still need to hear this argument. This article and the accompanying video make it clear: zeros demotivate students and count more than their successes! 

“Why So Many Teachers Are Leaving, and Why Others Stay” in Cult of Pedagogy.. Jennifer Gonzalez shares eight teachers’ stories: four who are leaving and four who are not. These are critically important voices that need to be heard.  

“Stress, Hypervigilance, and Decision Fatigue: Teaching During Omicron And, no, “self care” isn’t the answer” in Education Week. Katy Faber paints a vivid picture of what it is like to teach during this difficult time in America. 

"Why is America the Only Country in the World With Regular School Shootings?" in Eudaimonia and Co via Medium. Umair Haque has gone to school all over the world and shares how American schools are horribly unique. The issues we are having are not functions of adolescent development but of American culture. 

"Pandemic Shadow Syllabus" in Sonya Hubor's blog. This is a short and wonderful teacher struggling with the pandemic point of view piece. Teachers – if you read only one of these, let it be this one. 

A few articles that deal with education’s social context: 

“Young people need power.' Southern students on safety, accountability, and what they need from adults” in Scalawag.  This is a series of statements from young people about what it is like to be in school now. Read what the kids say about their experiences! 

"Is Your Child Too Popular for Their Own Good?" in Lifehaker. While some parents are clueless and others are ruthless, there are many kinds of popular in school and this article explores what some studies say about how popularity in middle and high school translates into adulthood. 

“OP-ED: When It Comes To Book Bans, America Could Learn From Apartheid South Africa” in NewsOne. The comparison is eerie and frightening – and right on the money: book challenges in America today are frighteningly similar to those in South Africa during Apartheid. 

Two pieces that focus on equity in college admissions from The Atlantic: 

"College Admissions Are Still Unfair" Colleges are eliminating legacy admissions, but this will not make things much better. At Amherst, there is a greater percentage of white athletes than in the general student body – and many play sports like crew and squash. Sounds like white affirmative action to me. 

"Colleges Can Fix the Broken Admissions Process They Created" This is a great list of ways colleges could improve the admission process to benefit everyone! 

Two very different focuses on kids and youth sports: 

“Do youth sports really build character? What kids gain from sports depends on adults”  in KQED Mindshift. The benefits of sports participation for kids are entirely dependent on coaches and contexts. This article spells out clearly the nature of adult’s influence, for better or worse, on children. 

“Guys, I Swear I’m Only Transitioning So I Can Cheat at Girls’ Sports” in McSweeny's. This older McSweeny’s satire makes the point well: the controversy over trans students in sports is an invented issue that fans the flames of hate at the expense of kids who really need to be part of the team!  

I am currently reading House of Suns by Alastair Reynolds 

Reading for Treasure: Consider These Articles and VOTE!

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

Your vote is critically important. The polls are probably wrong. Here are some articles to think about as we move toward the November elections. I present them without introduction or commentary: 

Mother Jones (Video): “If Republicans Retake Congress in November, Here's What Their Agenda Will Look Like” 

NewsOne: “2022 Midterm Elections: Filibuster, Senate Control And The Importance Of Black Voters” 

Reuters: “Pro-Trump conspiracy theorists hound election officials out of office”

Financial Times: “Ukrainian officials ‘shocked’ as Republicans threaten tougher line on aid” 

The Guardian: “Republicans aim to pass national ‘don’t say gay’ law”

The Bulwark: “Attack Ads Are Darkening the Skin Tone of Black Candidates”

Atlantic:  “We need to take away children” 

New York Times: “Voters See Democracy at Risk, but Saving It Isn’t Priority” 

Wired: “The US Needs to Recognize Intimate Privacy as a Civil Right” 

The Washington Post: “Trump charged Secret Service ‘exorbitant’ rates at his hotels, records show”

CNN: “What could happen if an election denier is running elections” 

NBC: “Johnson's campaign is paying the law firm of a Trump attorney allegedly connected to Jan. 6 fake elector plot”

NPR: “Borrowers who were cut out of student loan relief describe 'a gut punch'”

CNN: “'I'm my own man': Colorado Republican Senate nominee fires back at Trump” 

Scientific American: “U.S. Lost 26 Years Worth of Progress on Life Expectancy” 

I am currently reading Gods, Monsters, and the Lucky Peach by Kelly Robson

Reading for Treasure: June is the Start of Summer Reading

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction!

Summer is an opportunity to pick up good books and read, read, read! June is important for many reasons. Now that I am retired, I love having more time to read all sorts of things. Here is a list of articles about books and reading and a few lists of titles you might want to pick up. 

Should the character or views of an author influence our reading choices? Some of my friends will not read books by certain writers because of these writers’ behavior and political involvement. I must say that The Color Purple was one of those few books I read in one sitting. I was dismayed to learn about the author’s anti-Semitism and even more about how the New Yorker treated it differently than another author’s racism: “What The New Yorker Didn’t Say About a Famous Writer’s Anti-Semitism”

I am so glad that I am not the only person who thinks that giving graduates the Dr. Seuss book, Oh, the Places You’ll Go is problematic. Please take a look at the Chicago Tribune opinion piece, “Time to Turn the Page on Children’s Books as Graduation Gifts.”

Two wonderful pieces about reading from The Atlantic.  We have all had books that stuck with us, moved us, and shaped us. For Lauren LeBlanc, that book was I Never Promised You A Rose Garden by Joanne Greenberg. In her article, “The Book That Said the Words I Couldn’t Say,” Ms. LeBlanc talks about the power of this book and the power of reading. Secondly, here is a snarky fun piece from last summer, “Please Don’t Read at the Beach.” 

I am volunteering with Chicon 8: The 80th World Science Fiction Convention coming to downtown Chicago Labor Day Weekend. So I thought it would be fun to think about books set in Chicago. Better yet, you can use this site, recommended by this Lifehacker article to find books set in any location: “This Site Helps You Find Books Set Where You Live.”

Juneteeth comes in June, so here are two Juneteenth reading lists: one from NewsOne and another from Facing History. 

June is Pride Month. Here is a list of the finalists for the Lambda Literary Awards. CNN provided a useful article for LGBTQ+ reading for younger readers: “A guide to LGBTQ summer reading for kids and teens -- from authors themselves.” 

Two good articles from Lit Hub. First, their choices for summery summer reading: “Our 15 Favorite Summery Novels for Summer Reading” as well as their “The Ultimate Summer 2022 Reading List.”

Of course, we must have some genre summer reads! Here are some recent genre award finalists and winners: 

The shortlist for the Nommo Awards, given annually by the African Speculative Fiction Society

The Nebula Winners from the Science Fiction and Fantasy Writers of America (SFWA): 

The fan’s choice: the Hugo finalists! The winners will be announced at Chicon 8: The World Science Fiction Convention in Chicago! 

The books honored by Locus Magazine: Locus Top Ten Finalists

I am currently rereading Time Enough For Love by Robert Heinlein 

Reading for Treasure: Dating

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles (and other readings) that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction.

Lifehacker recently had an interesting series on dating. I had two other articles that related to that and a theme for this month’s reading for treasure was born. 

Dating in the twenty-first century is far more complicated and technological than it was when I was looking for a partner. Lifehacker’s articles deal with the apps, researching dates, and other nuances that I never had to think about: 

“13 of the Best Dating Apps to Find Love or Mess Around”

“All the Ways You're Being Rude on Dating Apps Without Realizing It”

“This Is How Much Online ‘Stalking’ You Should Do Before a Date”

“How Long Should You Chat on a Dating App Before Meeting Up?”

I haven’t repeated an article before, but this gem from The Atlantic that I included two months ago seems like required reading if you want an egalitarian relationship: “If You Want a Marriage of Equals, Then Date as Equals.” 

Finally, a crystal clear statement from Tim Wise:  “Refusing to Date Trump Voters Isn’t Intolerance — It’s Good Taste”

I am currently reading The Parable of the Talents by Octavia Butler 

Five Weddings and I Have Questions

In the past five weeks, my wife and I attended five weddings. The weddings were outdoor and indoor, big and little, religious and secular. We know the families well and we were outsiders. We traveled and stayed close to home. It has been rejuvenating and wonderful to share the joy of these couples and their families. Yet, as I reflect on these weddings, I have questions. 

Planning a wedding is rehearsal for marriage. The dynamics that will become the backdrop of married life are developing for most of these couples. The event itself is a reflection of the couple and, sometimes, their parents. Some weddings are big parties, others are an affirmation of tradition, and some feel like skating on silk. 

It has been more than thirty years since my wife, our families, and I planned our wedding. It is clear there is a continuum of involvement in wedding planning for the grooms. Some sit to the side and do as they are told. I am a theatre director and English teacher. I like control. I was actively part of putting together our wedding. Most of the grooms seemed involved in the wedding, although one joked about the triviality of his participation.  

Gender roles were very much on display at these weddings – and there are things that baffle me. Of course, I want to walk my child down the aisle. I can’t imagine NOT doing that. However, in several of the weddings we saw, only dad walked the bride down the aisle. Often the groom walked down by himself. Both parents walking their child down the aisle was the exception, which surprised me. One of the side effects of this is that certain parts of each family are more visible and others slip into the background.

What surprised me more was the line at the end of the ceremony: “Let me introduce for the first time, Mr. and Mrs.” Many of these weddings finished that with “Groom’s first and last name.” So the bride was just Mrs. That felt strange to me. Twice, it was “Mr. and Mrs. Groom’s last name.” I guess that is a little more egalitarian, but not much. Twice, it was Mr. and Mrs. Bride and Groom and Groom’s last name,” so at least the bride got her first name in there. One time, the bride and groom were introduced separately, although the bride was introduced with the groom’s last name. I did not take it as a given that my wife would take my last name. We discussed it. I know so many people who do not change their names when they get married, so maybe this was not a representative sample. 

I have only officiated at one wedding. While I hope I did an okay job, I am sure that our rabbi would have done it better. Weddings feel far too important to leave to amateurs. Two of the weddings had a friend officiate. They were fine. One had someone I assume they hired. He did better with the ceremony, but it was clear that he didn’t really know the couple. This is one of myriad reasons to be part of a community. The ceremonies that I thought worked the best were led by officiants who knew the couple and were experts on how to make a wedding work well. 

Most of the couples wrote their own vows or wrote letters to each other. In most cases, they read these, although once, the officiant read them. These were universally beautiful and the best part of the ceremonies. When this part was absent, the ceremony felt far less personal. The readings in the weddings were, for the most part, traditional, tried, and true. They felt routine. The music was highly varied and included both religious and pop as well as tunes that I had never encountered. In a few ceremonies, the music felt more meaningful than the readings. 

Several of the weddings were grounded in religion while others appeared to go to great lengths to minimize religious references. I wonder how the couples who come from different backgrounds will deal with religion. Will they avoid it, as they did in their wedding? I worry when the way we deal with differences is to push them to the side. Why not celebrate our different cultures? 

I have questions about the receptions. I am not fussy about the food (but I love it when someone cares enough to worry about us vegetarians) and I don’t drink much beyond the toasts. My wife and I like to dance a little. What is important to me is being able to connect with the people who invited me. I really appreciated it when the bride and groom and their families made it a point to greet their guests. I loved being able to meet family members I did not know – often very important people in this celebration! When some of these key people were inaccessible, I wondered if everything was okay. 

The toasts were very good. None of the weddings had those stereotypical horrible wedding embarrassments. The best toasts were obviously written in advance. The impromptu toasts, while clearly heartfelt, had less impact. However, a few times these toasts were written out and still ended up an unfocused ramble. I was curious about who did and did not speak. The bride’s father always spoke, but not always the bride’s mother. The groom’s parents sometimes spoke, but often, the mother less so. The best man and maid or matron of honor spoke in all but one, yet the other members of the wedding party, especially the siblings of the couple, didn’t always speak. When some of these important people did not toast the couple, I had questions. 

At the first and last of our five weddings, no one clinked glasses asking for the couple to kiss. I didn’t know how they managed that. It was brilliant. When I heard the clinking at the other weddings, it made me question the practice. Not only did I not miss it, but it gave the bride and groom the opportunity to move around more freely. 

I could list question upon question about the choices of song for the mother-son and father-daughter dances. There seems to be one that is clearly the standard choice for Christian families for the father-daughter dance. I did wonder about the father of the groom and the mother of the bride. Why not include them? Why not invite the families up to dance with each other after the traditional gendered dancing. 

Two of the weddings threw the bouquet and garter. Like the glass clinking, I didn’t miss these when they were absent and found it a bit jarring. One of these weddings seemed to take it seriously and the other played with them in a funny and sexy way. It was nice to have an activity that called people to the dance floor, but I wondered about the unspoken message about the importance of marriage. Okay, we were at a celebration of marriage. 

None of our five weddings was for a same sex couple. None of them was a second marriage. I wonder how these parts of the celebration would be seen in other forms of unions. 

Because symbols are so important to me, and I worked in a world where implied meanings reins, I was highly conscious of the combination of all the elements during my wife and my wedding. Not everyone appears to do this. As a theatre director, I think about my audience. But a wedding is not a play. It is for the couple and their families. The audience is as much witness as participant. For some, the real focus is on the couple, their experience, and how the wedding elements help them both celebrate and prepare for their life together. Still, I have questions. 

Reading for Treasure – Thanksgiving Leftovers

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles (and other readings) that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction.

Here are some Thanksgiving leftovers: articles I have been saving, but haven’t neatly fit into a theme or category for the past few posts. 

One member of my family used to get very upset when another member of the family would reply to texts simply with, “k.” This article from Lifehacker makes the case for not sending quick and short text responses like this one for a simple reason: it comes off as rude: “Don’t Text ‘OK.’”

If it isn’t clear from the name of my blog, I am an enthusiastic fan of Fred Rogers. There has been some conversation that his tone and style would not work well with kids today. I disagree and so does Mary Pflum Peterson in this older article from The Washington Post, “What Happened When I Showed Vintage Mister Rogers to my 21st Century Kids.” 

One of my most recent posts questions some of the traditions of weddings – many of which focus on gender. This wonderful Valentine’s Day article from The Atlantic makes the point clearly, “If You Want a Marriage of Equals, Then Date as Equals.” Yup. 

Speaking of couples with some issues, how about Lord and Lady Macbeth? I laughed out loud reading, “A Letter from the Condo Association to Mr. and Mrs. Macbeth” from McSweeny’s. While we all might have had neighborhood issues, these are on a Shakespearean scale! 

While the above piece is satirical, this satire piece from last winter’s Chicago Tribune by Rex Huppke is right on point in its treatment of “deniers.” Whether it is the pandemic, insurrections, or other clear and verifiable events, Mr. Huppke joins them to cry, “A Major Chicago Snow Storm? That’s What the Media Want You to Believe!” Snowstorms? Hurricanes? Bah, humbug! They are all conspiracies. 

Finally, a wonderful and relevant discussion of an interesting dice game called “Drop Dead” in the fantastic blog, Math with Bad Drawings. This game, which you could certainly play, also demonstrates a lesson about complex systems and the idea that more is better: “When A Trillion Dice Are No Better Than A Dozen.” 

I am currently rereading Frank Herbert’s Dune before seeing the movie! 

Reading for Treasure: December

Reading for Treasure is my list of articles that are worth your attention. Click here for an introduction! Here are some articles to read before the holidays.

What Sci-Fi Can Teach Computer Science About Ethics: As a teacher of Science Fiction, I believe that the genre can give readers far more than a glimpse into the future. One of the most powerful aspects of SF is its commentary on ethics and morality. Science Fiction is almost always about the present far more than about the future, and this Wired article explores why future computer engineers might benefit from a little SF literature!

The Comforting Fictions of Dementia Care: This long article from The New Yorker debates whether or not we should lie to our relatives with Alzheimer’s and other forms of dementia. My view, before I read this article, was that contradicting and correcting memory challenged adults is irritating to everyone and helps no one. Now, I am not so certain. The moral and ethical issues raised here have given me a great deal to consider.

The Definition Of 'They': This short piece from NPR explores the word “they” as a singular pronoun referring to someone whose gender identity is non-binary. The Merriam-Webster dictionary, as well as many style guides, now recognize the use of the word “they” in this manner. In fact, this use of the pronoun is Merriam-Webster's word of the year! As a former English teacher, using a plural pronoun for a singular subject was a change of habit, but a necessary one: it meant treating my students with the respect and care that they deserved! It was the right thing to do!

The Problem With the “On the Spectrum” Armchair Diagnosis: In this article from Fatherly, the writer makes the argument that, when a non-medical professional says someone is, “on the spectrum”, they are trying to “explain away behavior considered odd. It’s wrong, yes, but also potentially damaging to people living with ASD whose disorder is increasingly misunderstood as it is weaponized.” Just as it is wrong to call someone “retarded,” and use of that word harms more than the person at whom it is directed, this article argues that the overuse of “on the spectrum” has similar ill effects.

White Folks ‘Embarrassed to Admit’ They Just Learned About the 1921 Tulsa Race Massacre Through an Episode of ‘Watchmen’: This Atlanta Black Star article responds to the opening scene in the new HBO series, Watchman, which shows the destruction a prosperous neighborhood in Tulsa, Oklahoma by a Ku Klux Klan attack. It points out that there are important and pivotal parts of our history that have been ignored, erased, or otherwise hidden. While the TV series is addressing contemporary racial issues, watching Watchman should not be the primary way we expand our understanding of the complex and problematic history of race in the United States – and such an understanding is critical for everyone!

Twenty First Century Fathering

As we approach Father’s Day, I think about how fathering has changed since I became a parent. I look at my friends who have children under the age of fifteen and see many following a different path than their parents. I see true parental partnering. I see dads staying at home and parents sharing the child-rearing opportunities. There is a different model of fathering for the twenty-first century.

For more than fifteen years, I called myself a full-time father and a part-time teacher. I was not going to be a “babysitter.” I was not going to be the father who left the primary parenting to his wife. I did not want my children, when difficult issues came up, to say, “I need to talk to mom.”

There are issues that mom handles better than dad. There are times when the kids know which parent is the go-to person. That is also part of the balance. I want my children to have role positive models of both fathering and mothering. My parents did a great job in the 60s, 70s, and 80s. I remember being the only one of my friends whose mother did not stay at home. I remember when that changed. As my wife and I approached parenting, we consciously decided to move further down that line. We shared taking time off of work for parental leave. We alternated who stayed home with sick children. We both got up in the middle of the night. The only tasks that were assigned by were breastfeeding!

Every year, I give a presentation for the parents of freshman students at my school. The meeting is at 9:30 am, which works well if you are a stay-at-home parent. However, many parents arrive wearing the same kind of name badge ID that I wear. They left work to attend the meeting. We usually get between twenty and forty parents. Well, it is almost always twenty to forty moms. However, in the past few years, more men have been attending as well. The percentages are not high enough that I want to note them here, but the trend is moving in a good direction. Maybe someday soon, there will be as many dads as moms at the school meetings.

I am optimistic that things are changing –and changing is the key word here. I vividly recall taking my daughter to the shopping mall when she was about one year old. When it came time to change her diaper, I went into the bathroom, but there was no changing station. I went to the information desk and asked where I could find a changing station? I was told that only the women’s restrooms were so equipped. So I changed my daughter’s diaper on the counter at the information desk.

Today, there are changing stations in many men’s public bathroom. Not only would there be no changing station in my bathroom, when I was with my daughter, I could not go to the bathroom at all! I was delighted to see a baby holding device on the back of a stall door in one bathroom as well!

So out there, somewhere, younger dads are moving parenting into the future. Businesses did not see the need for changing tables when my children were young, but now they do. I hope this works both ways: parents have asked for this, and dads now access them. 

Happy Father’s Day, dads! Happy going to the meetings, changing the diapers, and being an active, intentional, and critical partner in the parenting of your children. Happy twenty-first century parenting!

No More Dopey Disappearing Dads!

Like Rodney Dangerfield, dads do not get enough respect. A father who is active and involved in his children’s lives is emasculated with the title, “Mr. Mom” which implies that what he is doing is really feminine. With some notable exceptions, Dads on television and in other forms of popular media are portrayed as bumbling fools who put the baby’s diaper on the dog. Why is positive fathering so maligned? What is it about a man who is as present in his kids’ lives as their mother that is so threatening that we turn him into a clown?

There may be several answers. The easy and pat one is that we don’t have good role models for this kind of fathering. Most of us had fathers who spent most of their lives working and were only home in the evenings, sometimes arriving after the rest of the household had finished dinner and often when the children were already asleep. Some of these families had stay-at-home moms. And even in the households with working mothers, the wife was still in charge of all the traditional parenting responsibilities. So we men haven’t seen this kind of fathering in action.

Baloney! Involved fathers have been around as long as there have been fathers. Not all fathers who were the primary breadwinners were distant and invisible. As our mothers took advantage of their new found freedom to leave the home, many households were forced to rebalance parenting functions. I would concede that the highly active father in the past stayed underground. He may have seen himself in a negative light. Why is that? Same question.

What about the “men make more money” argument? While it is true that, statistically, men earn higher wages than women, I know many families where the wife earns as much or more money than the husband. If the reason were entirely economic, we’d see families with high earning moms with stay at home dads. Why are stay at home dads so extremely rare? Again, same question.

One real reason that active Dads are undervalued is that many households are still stuck in the 1950s (or it could be 1850s) gender role rut. I still can’t figure out why, when a family goes out in Mom’s vehicle (sometimes a mini-van) that Dad has to drive. Does Mom drive when they go out in Dad’s car? Why do so many professional women take time out to raise their families when their husbands would not think once about doing so? Even in homes where both partners work, it is often mom who is solely in charge of the child related responsibilities. Why?

Because, let’s face it, men just aren’t good at those tasks. Women are more naturally maternal and they can better schedule the babysitter, drive the carpools, call the doctor and attend the school nights. Wait a minute! What is maternal (or paternal) about any of those things? None of those tasks is at all based in anything biological or even sociological. Men can schedule, drive, and go to meetings just as well (or badly) as women.

One real reason is that moms have kept dads off their turf. For a long list of reasons, many men get the clear message that they shouldn’t tread on their wives parenting territory. No one is good at changing the first dozen diapers. No one is born knowing how to confront parenting challenges. We learn by doing and if we don’t do, we don’t develop parenting skills. Men get this message from their wives, mothers, and the popular media. However, they get this message from each other as well and that is really sad.

Every couple has its divisions of labor. Sometimes these are divided by aptitude. One is just better at certain tasks. Sometimes these are divided by desire. One likes or dislikes certain chores. However, sometimes there are those plum or poison tasks that both partners want or want to avoid. Parenting is both of these and frequently mom takes them all.

Shouldn’t the main goal be what is good for the children? Is it good for the kids to have both parents active and present? Is it good for the kids to have positive nurturing female and male figures? Wouldn’t kids benefit from role models of both genders?

Men need to take responsibility and insist on being as active in their children’s lives as any other adult (including mom). Women need to welcome men as their equal partners in parenting. When they do, the big winners will be families!