Twenty Years Ago: January 2004

I was surprised by all the ways that January 2004 was similar to January 2024. It was quite different, of course, but the similarities showed how things had not changed. While this reflection on twenty years ago has been a wide-eyed tour of the past, it also shows how my present is still connected to that long ago time. 

I laughed when I described our return from vacation as, “mildly overwhelming” because I was feeling the same thing after I got off the plane with my twenty-something children and my aging eighty-something parents. 

Similarly, the entire family spent a few days, “bubble headed” then and now. We got home and everyone went to sleep, even though it was 7am. Some of us took longer to get back on Central Time – the same someones as twenty years ago. 

We arrived home exhausted and, as I went to bed, “I was so tired last night that when I tried to read, the book kept slipping from my hands.” I had napped earlier but it didn’t matter at all. We were pooped! 

Twenty years ago, my daughter got a stomach bug as we got home from vacation. The same thing happened this year. However, this year, she had to suffer on a plane back to D.C! I felt guilty that I could not nurse her the way I did in 2004. 

Fortunately, unlike 2004, none of the rest of us caught that bug. In 2004, it went through the house like that nauseating montage in the movie version of The Secret Life of Dentists. In 2004, we also shared colds; not doing that this year.  

I laughed out loud when I referred to, “The ladies of the morning;” my mother, my wife’s sister, and my wife’s aunt, who would always call us before 8am. While that no longer happens, my wife and daughter have a morning call routine now. 

As it was in 2004, I returned home and I almost immediately planned the next trip. Then it was a spring break visiting my cousin in Florida back then, this year, it is little jaunts, local science fiction conventions, and a February escape. We no longer celebrate spring break. 

January remains a month of dental visits for most of us. While we no longer have a dog, my daughter’s dog had his dental visit, too. He is in much better health than our elderly ailing dog was in 2004. I was considering doggie diapers, the insulin was so ineffective. 

When my parents moved recently, I found a disc with old photos. My father took photos of the house in 2004 for insurance purposes. Most of the house looked pretty much as it did before they moved. 

That is where the similarities end. In 2004, we had some significant snowfalls, the water main broke and we had no water for a while. The furnace’s pilot light went out and we spent a very cold evening before we figured out the issue. We saw The Lion King with the folks and the kids. It was a little much for our younger child. 

As I have written about in the past, our school moved finals before winter break a few years ago. In 2004, we had two weeks of class then finals, and then the start of the new semester. That makes things more stressful. I do not miss all that grading! I would sit in my younger child’s room and try to get on the school network since the school was just over the fence. Sometimes it worked. 

I often told the story that my parents complained that their grandchildren always used “please” and “thank you” with them. I didn’t know my reply was exactly twenty years old, “At dinner, when my father made his please-thank you comment, I informed him that we were making a special rule just for him. Where the kids normally said, “please,” they would instead say, “now” or “darn it” and instead of “thank you,” they would say “finally” or “it’s about time.”

My daughter made the school spelling bee. I really don’t like spelling bees.  I rehearsed and then officiated a bat mitzvah since our congregation had not yet hired a rabbi. Like this year, the end of the month brought snow and brutal cold. 

Finally, “I was awakened at 1:55am by a  phone call telling me that the folks alarm had gone off and should they send the police? At that time of night, I thought it best to have the police go look around. However, if the problem was something inside, a burst pipe or other problem, they wouldn’t see it. I needed to go to the house. So I got dressed, bundled up and off I went.” Fortunately, that situation has not happened often. My parents just moved out of that house and now live only ten minutes north of me. 

If you ask me what were the highlights (or lowlights) of January (or February) of 2004, I probably could not have provided many specifics. When I read my old journals, it come back powerfully. Things have changed so much, mostly for the better, but I miss when my kids were little and my parents were younger. I do not miss the frenetic and stressful life we lived in 2004. 

Twenty Years Ago: December 2003

For so many years, December was the most challenging month of the year. The weather turns colder, the weeks of school between Thanksgiving and winter break are hectic, and there are many holiday celebrations. I am not sure this got any better as my children got older. Thus, my level of busy was at its peak, “My school computer froze on me yesterday and it is sitting in the tech office. I have a haircut, interdepartmental lunch, I’m teaching Humanities solo and I need the laptop cart in the computer lab. It is going to be one hell of a day. Oh, and did I mention there is an FAC meeting after school. Oh yeah, need to call the kids’ doctor to set up a nasal spray session for them.”

The dog was still waking us up early – but not enough. He was leaving us smelly surprises, too. He was nearly blind, but had an operation on his eyes that was helpful – and time-consuming. 

We celebrated Hanukkah with family and at temple. I was also getting ready for a special family trip for winter break! We had never been on such a long plane flight as a family. Boarding a dog with significant medical needs was challenging. I kept waiting for the kennel to tell me it was too much. They didn’t say that in December – but they did say it later. 

I noted that, although a lot was going on at school, it was the portion of the day over which I felt like I had the most control, “Teaching is a challenge today, but that was the easiest part of the day.”

Packing for ten days out of town with young children was stressful, “We are going to schlep a ton of bags. We have four small bags, several as little as one of our carry-ons, one large Pullman, a car seat, three backpacks (carried on), and one rolled-on carry-on. Thank goodness we do not have a connecting flight; with so many pieces of luggage, the odds of getting one misplaced are way too good. Unlike my usual strategy, two of the bags primarily have the kids’ stuff and three have mostly our stuff.” It was clear to me, even then, that we overpacked. Oh, well. 

One theme of this retrospective of 2003 is that we had lots of colds. December was no different. One of my children almost always had a cold and either my wife or I would share it. However, this was the first time that our children got a flu shot. That helped! 

As we got closer to winter break, I found I was more and more desperate for the time off, – “I just need some downtime. I just need some time to turn off the real world.” Recently, one of my children felt the same way. These trips are now more about being together than relaxing and decompressing – but that was not the case twenty years ago.  

When we finally left, the kids were great on the long flight “Both took naps, both watched DVD, both nibbled and read and played chess. They are awesome.” They were and are great travelers. I sat between them with lots of activities and things to eat. The trip there was laden with anticipation, which helped. 

The trip itself was wonderful. I think that getting away from Chicago’s gray and cold weather is healthy and helpful. A change of scene is also a great way to feel renewed and see things differently. However, we do make the distinction between a trip and a vacation. While there were some vacation elements, such as the children going to the resort’s kids club, this was most certainly a trip. 

One child had an issue with water in the ear that necessitated a house call from a doctor. We learned that, after a day of play, the kids might literally fall asleep at dinner if we ate too late. One fell asleep and I had to carry him back to our room. 

We celebrated Hanukkah and enjoyed the resort’s Christmas activities. My parents traveled with us, and have over winter break since the kids were born. It was great to be together. I have always been so grateful that my parents have been such an integral part of my children’s lives – and are to this day. 

On the way home, the kids were tired. Yes, they slept, but they were also out of sorts. No one was looking forward to going back to the cold – or regular life. And then we moved on to 2004, as we now move into 2024: with hope, with conviction, with anxiety, and with renewed resolve. 

Happy everything to everyone! 

With Apologies to Noel Coward, A Plea During the Week Before Spring Break!

Don’t pull your daughter out of school, Mrs. Worthington

Don’t pull your daughter out of school

She is already confounded

This class’s pretty tough

And admitting the fact that she can’t subtract

If that isn’t reason enough

She’s a nice girl and though her grades are just fair

She’s not the type that can rebound and retool

I repeat, Mrs. Worthington, sweet Mrs. Worthington

Don’t pull your daughter out of school!

Regarding yours, dear Mrs. Worthington

Of the week before the break

Although you got a great deal on the flight

I won’t give up the fight since we can’t teach her to write

If you make her disappear, Mrs. Worthington

It is beyond absurd

Why in reality would you unilaterally take her away, missing those days

And setting her back weeks!

Don’t pull your daughter out of school, Mrs. Worthington

Don’t pull your daughter out of school

She’s a bit of a slow starter, you must honestly confess

And the quality of her work would surely defeat

Her chances of her success

It’s not that she doesn’t exactly excel in class

But missing before break, she’ll be April’s fool

On my knees, Mrs. Worthington, please Mrs. Worthington

Don’t pull your daughter out of school

Don’t pull your daughter out of school, Mrs. Worthington

Don’t pull your daughter out of school

Though they showed movies before break

At the junior high last year

I’m afraid, missing class, she’ll not pass, we don’t do that here.
She’ll come back with a tan, from her two weeks in Cannes

But by missing a week, she’ll not swim but sink!

No more buts, Mrs. Worthington, nuts! Mrs. Worthington

Don’t pull your daughter out of school!

Helpless and Holding My Breath

I didn’t know what it was like to hold my breath for four months, until I was finally able to exhale. I didn’t know what it was like to have one of my children away – really far away, 7000 miles away – and how difficult that would be. And I didn’t know the relief and the incredible release that her return would bring.

My elder child’s study abroad semester in Kenya was a learning experience for all of us. It felt like a long time. It felt like that old joke: I spent a month with my in-laws one weekend.

While the departure was difficult, it now feels like the easiest part of the journey. The random panic attacks, sudden teary eyes, and overwhelming anticipation of a video chat became rituals to which I never fully adjusted.

And then the early morning phone call:  At 6am on Saturday, September 20, it rang. I was half asleep when I answered it; my daughter said, “Daddy, I’m fine.” Great, I thought, “Why are you calling? What is going on?” There had been a terrorist attack at a shopping mall about two kilometers from her apartment. The siege on that mall would last several days. Only later would my daughter tell me that, at the time of the attack, she and her roommate were on their way there.

My brother called and said we should bring her home. Now. And having her home would certainly have been good for my blood pressure and racing heartbeat. Yet, I knew that wasn’t going to happen. The university told us she was safe. My wife pointed out that there are dangers everywhere. Most of all, my daughter did not think it was necessary to leave. I had to rely her judgment. Her judgment is excellent, and I have come to trust it. My emotional and protective side wanted her under my care. But I knew that I could no more protect her here, than I could there. She was going to have to navigate these situations on her own. And although I knew she could, I wanted to be by her side. I wanted to continue coaching and parenting. I couldn’t and I shouldn’t and it was one of the most difficult things NOT to do.

Things did calm down. Life returned to the new normal in both Africa and our home. We scheduled a weekly video chat. We exchanged occasional text messages and emails. I can’t say I got used to it. I would race home from Sunday school and set up for our weekly sighting. And when she didn’t want to say goodbye, I wanted to reach through the screen and hug her.

There were the little illnesses, difficulties with classes, and the usual bumps that any college student or world traveler experiences. I watched her handle them beautifully.   I worried when she wasn’t feeling well and wondered about where she could get good medical care if she needed it. Being thousands of miles from campus, I marveled as she registered for next semester, applied for a job, and arranged for housing from afar.

For one week, she was staying in a home in a distant part of Kenya. Rural week, it was called. She didn’t know if her hosts would have electricity, running water, or would even speak English. We talked the day before she left and then we crossed our fingers.

Midweek, my phone rang! She was checking in! Fortunately, she was staying in the home of a government official and college professor! Other students had much more primitive lodgings. She could use her cell phone to call us and I was relieved. It worked out fine.

That, I guess, is the theme of this entire experience: It worked out fine. I knew that she could take care of difficult challenges without me. I learned that I could not only let her do that, but I would survive standing on the sidelines and being so far out of the action.

And now, she is back in the arms of the family. After a grueling two-day journey, we are back together, and I can breathe again. I wanted to fly to Africa and accompany her home. I exercised all my bad helicopter parent tendencies on the last leg of the journey. I tracked her flight and touched base at each of her five cities. I raced to the airport to meet her. I got there too soon and paced and fretted.

And I know the big lesson: we are going to do this again – and again and again. I better get used to it. I don’t know if I will. I was jealous of parents whose kids came home for Thanksgiving. I was jealous of parents of students studying in London, Rome, Madrid, and even Perth. But that isn’t my child. My child will be going to learn in much more remote and unusual locations. And I am going to practice breathing.

My Week as a Downtown Commuter

Time is my most valuable commodity. Which would you prefer, at the end of the day or year or later: a few more dollars or a few more minutes? If someone has a half hour drive to work each day, that means at least an hour a day in the car. So commuting takes almost an entire day each month. Each year, this commuter would spend almost two weeks going back and forth to work. And a half hour is a very reasonable commute. That is a great deal of life to spend. That is expensive.

I am very fortunate to live next door to the school at which I teach. My commute is a six-minute walk, even in the worst of weather. However, this past week, I got a taste of a very different routine. I signed up for a seminar being held on Northwestern’s Chicago campus.

I could have driven downtown. That would have taken about an hour in the car each way and then finding and paying for a place to park. My other option was to take public transportation. This would mean I would need to leave about a half hour earlier and give up my flexibility to come and go as I please. However, it would make the ride time usable time. I could read, write, or relax. It was also less expensive. Since I drive all the time, I decided to take the train and bus and see what it was like.

On a normal school day, I get up around 5:30 am and get to school around 7:30. My train left at 6:44, so I needed to get out of the house no later than 6:30. My train ride to the city was the most relaxing part of the commute. Once I arrived at Union Station, I needed to find a CTA bus to take me to campus. That ride took about twenty minutes. I usually arrived in the classroom about twenty minutes before class starts.

Of course there were a few glitches. One day, I exited the train and got turned around. I ended up on the wrong side of Union Station and struggled to find my bus stop. I sometimes had difficulty finding a bus to take me back to Union Station.

Sometimes, I was afraid I was going to miss my bus or train. I was worried I would get on the wrong bus or train. Once, I had a very large (and smelly) man sit next to me. However, as the week progressed, I got accustomed to the routine.

I read on the train; I wrote letters to my children at camp. I wrote this blog posting on the train. It was safer to make phone calls (quietly) on the train. I realized I could actually get tasks done on the train. The work I did on the train gave me more time when I got home. And once the train or bus left and I calmed down, I really began to enjoy the ride. This was especially true on the bus. I was like a tourist, appreciating the great beauty of the city. I people watched. Once the tension of catching the train or bus was gone, it was a far more relaxing trip than any drive downtown.

If I had to commute a long distance, I think I would take the train much of the time. But I am not willing to spend my time that way. A friend once said to me, "You are so lucky to live so close to your job." There is no luck involved. It was a very conscious decision. I know that not everyone can make that choice. I am very grateful that I could.

Traveling with Children

As my family and I got on the last leg of our almost twenty-four hour journey home, we heard the all too familiar wail of a crying child. My father joked that every plane is equipped with one. If you have a flight without a crying kid, you will get two the next time.

The child was screaming, “Mommy! Mommy! Mommy!” Her father was visibly frustrated. If their journey had been anything like ours, I understood how tired that child might be. However, as soon as the child got mommy, she started to scream, “Daddy! Daddy” Daddy!” That clued me in that this tantrum might be more than common fatigue.

For the next three and half hours, this toddler screamed, often in pitches that I could only detect by feeling the windows vibrate. Her parents walked her up and down the aisles, offered her crayons, toys, and treats. Nothing worked.

I was traveling with my two children, who were considerably older than the screamer. Yet, they have been on planes since they were infants. We are fortunate enough to have the means to travel a few times a year and my kids have become wonderful travelers.

There is a trick to it. My wife and I were very deliberate about how we handled traveling with the kids. We found that the keys were good planning, balancing adult and child needs, practice, and a lot of backbone!

We learned this the hard way. When our daughter was about nine months old, we took her to Quebec. It was awful. I remember quietly huddling behind a screen in a tiny hotel room praying that she would go to sleep and exiting a restaurant with our food in bags because my child could no longer sit still in the high chair.

Taking an infant on a vacation is strenuous. I have changed diapers on laps, in airplane lavatories, and the open spaces near doors. I have schlepped diaper bags that weighed more than my checked luggage. And who could forget dragging car seats and strollers through the narrow aisles of an airplane!

We learned the travel tricks. When our kids were young, I planned for the travel like I was putting together a lesson plan. I had videos (long before there were laptops or portable video player; I rigged my camcorder to work in reverse and put Sesame Street into it!), books, music, treats, games, and more ready to go. Diaper changing (and later potty breaks) were part of the schedule. I had spare clothes, extra diapers, pull ups, and always a wrapped surprise. They never knew when it would come, but it was a great motivation to stay with the program.

Someone had suggested giving our daughter Benadryl on the plane, so she would sleep. I called the doctor and she wisely suggested a test run first. To my child, it was rocket fuel. Drugging kids on the plane may be tempting, but if your goal is to help your kids become good travelers, it defeats the purpose.

As the kids got older, the key was to give them more responsibility for the planning. My children would pack their own bags (and carry them) that contained their favorite activities. I still brought little extras and surprises. I hit upon travel and card games and those became the focus of our longer journeys. Yes, my kids would also bring movies and music and those were great. The real saviors were books! My kids would read through very long journeys. It was profoundly ironic when, on a four-hour car ride through the Arizona desert, I stuck my head in the backseat to say to my kids, “Put down the darn books and look at the beautiful scenery!”

The journey may be half the fun, but the other half must be child friendly too. When our kids were young, we picked travel spots that had kid appeal. Quebec did not. There had to be a kids club or kid activities at resorts or kid friendly attractions when we were touring. Our schedule revolved around their home schedule. When they were young, we always stopped for nap-time. Kids travel better when they aren’t tired. We stayed in places that had kitchenettes or rented condominiums and prepared many meals in or took out from places to avoid the long waits in restaurants and the $16 grilled cheese sandwiches! We loved hotels with buffets because they provided everyone with choices and moved quickly. All hotels had to have a pool!

Our entire family (including grandparents) just returned from a tour of Alaska. We had many new experiences and getting home took almost an entire day. My kids were great! I remember an old Plugger cartoon that showed two weary parents walking away from the baggage claim with suitcases and kids under their arms. The caption read, “After the trip, pluggers need a vacation.” I can honestly say that traveling with my children may sometimes be a trip, but it is always a vacation!

Winter Break, How I Love Thee

Let me count the ways:

Your timing is impeccable. December may not be the middle of the school year but it feels like it. The weather has cooled, snow has fallen, and the freshness of the fall is gone. Summer vacation feels very far away. By the end of December, I am tired and I need down time.

You are long enough to actually give me a true break. Most breaks from school are a day or maybe two. Even Thanksgiving break is not long enough to really create distance from school. Most days off are really a chance to catch up. I spend most school holidays grading papers, planning and whittling my list down to a reasonable size. Of course I do work during winter break too, but the work does not dominate the time. I can do other things and not feel like I should be doing schoolwork. There is plenty of time for the many things I want to do.

You provide me with a change of scene. For many years, I didn’t care to go away during spring break. It is too short. Winter break is my family’s time to get out of town. I value this change of scene. When I am at home, home calls to me. There are chores to do, bills to pay, errands to run. When I am away, I can’t attend to all those mundane details. I love having a week or so to just “be” and not “do.”

You rejuvenate me. After winter break, I feel renewed and can return to work with new energy. Unlike summer, I am not eager to return. The break isn’t long enough for that. However, I feel like I have actually been away and, since I haven’t spent a majority of my time on school, I can see some through the stress and frenetic fogs of December. I have more patience upon my return and that is a good thing as we roll into final exams.

You provide me with quality family time. I spend a vast majority of winter break with my wife, kids, and parents. We eat together and the meals are slow and luxurious. We play games and watch movies. On vacation, we spend most of our time as a group. It is a great time to talk about important (and trivial) issues. Whether it is my son’s impending bar mitzvah, my daughter’s college plans, my parents’ health issues, or household planning, winter break is the time for substantive family dialogue.

You let me read things that are not for school. My winter break reading, unlike much of my summer reading, consists almost entirely of material I will never teach. I read fluffy science fiction, parenting non-fiction, and computer and health periodicals.

Winter break, you are my favorite time away from school. Shorter than summer, but far more sweet, longer than spring break and better timed, you are the best of the school holidays.

I must admit, winter break, that when you leave me, I feel stranded and cold. Getting back to school after winter break is a dive into a cold pool and it takes at least a week to adjust. Summer break fades away while winter break shuts off. While it is a difficult transition it does not negate the positives. Winter break, how I love thee!

When The Kids Are Away, Dad Misses Them

Soon, I will drive to Michigan to pick up my children. About four weeks ago, my daughter left for overnight camp. A few days later, my son joined her. Tonight, I sit in a very quiet house. Since my wife and I are both educators, when our children are away, we have long days of freedom. It is lovely and we enjoy it. We often spend part of these weeks traveling. Or when we are at home, we try catch up on movies, reading, and finding those wonderful restaurants that don’t serve the orange food that my son requires.

Yet, there is another side to my children’s absence. I do my best not to be one of “those” parents who hover and protect, enable and smother. I work against those instincts when I am aware of them. I think it is important that my children have time away from their home and parents. But I miss them. I really, really miss them.

I love the time my wife and I get to spend alone while they are gone. We usually take an annual “honeymoon” and, while we are away, it seems fair. They are on vacation and we are on vacation. We communicate with our children the old fashion way by the written word. Of course, no matter where we are, we scourer the camp website for their photographs. As long as I am distracted by a novel location and the thrill of new sights, I can fend off the longing for my kids.

But we don’t stay away as long as they are at camp. Yes, I throw myself into work. I prepare lesson plans and get the first two or three (or four) weeks of handouts copied and organized. I decorate my classroom and get ready for the start of another school year. I focus on the children who will enter my classroom and it distracts me from thoughts about my own children.

My son writes us micro-letters from camp. They are a few sentences long and communicate feeling far more than fact. Between his letters and the photos, we get a blurry view of his camp experience. My daughter, however, is a CIT, a counselor in training. She calls us periodically. She tells us about her campers, how the counselors are treating her, what happened during the day. I just listen and restrain my desire to give too much advice. Fortunately, I cannot call her. She must call me.

Recently, a friend’s Facebook status was that he was missing his kids because they were with his ex-wife for the weekend. Since my kids just left for camp, I understood his statement in a new way. I winced, thinking about a system that would make me feel this way every week or month.

Then, another thought occurred to me: college! My daughter is only two years away from leaving the nest for more than four weeks. Oh, yes, but I will not be limited to letters or one way calling. I can call whenever I want or email or send a Facebook message or…uh-oh.

So perhaps the upside of this separation is that is helping all of us see our relationships anew. It is providing us with needed distance and independence. No matter how much you love each other, some time apart is healthy. I must stop writing this blog entry now because I need to get to the camp website. It is my daily fix of my children and I really need it!

Politics or Basketball

As a District 113 parent and teacher, the national media attention regarding Highland Park High School’s girls’ basketball team hits close to home. The questions seem to be: should the team be allowed to play in a tournament in Arizona? Was this choice a political statement or a means to protect children?

Why does a coach or teacher take a group out of town in the first place? Is a plane ride to Arizona going to provide a better basketball experience than one that requires a bus ride? As with all educational activities, educators choose the best options to meet their learning targets. Whether it is a trip to China, Indianapolis, or Disney World, the choice should be in the best educational interests of the students. Yes, this is a basketball team not a class. However, all school activities must have educational worth. As many people will attest, significant learning occurs through participation in athletics.

Taking a group of students out of town is a big deal. Guiding a large group through the airport, managing tickets, medicines, permission slips, and personalities makes trips like this tournament a logistical challenge. The costs add another layer to the complexity. Trips like the proposed Arizona tournament can put financial strain on families.

Why pick Arizona or any other tournament? Why reject it? What are the criteria? The coach must consider the logistics: can families afford to pay the necessary costs? Can we get there and back in time? There are always alternatives: is Arizona a better tournament than any others? What makes one tournament better?

Certainly the level of competition and opportunities for learning should be foremost factors in making this choice. The trip should be attractive to students and it should be worth their time and money to go. Like any other learning activity, it should be a match for the needs and skills of the students.

Are there any factors that would disqualify a choice? Some locations are very expensive. I am concerned when the costs of school sponsored trips become so expensive that they seem to be only for wealthier families. Even with scholarship money, fund raising revenues and educational discounts, it is hard to justify huge price tags for experiences like these trips.

Safety is a key issue too. No school group should go to places that are on the State Department’s travel advisory list. I would wonder about any “extreme adventure” travel destinations with young people. Safety also has different meanings depending on the age of the students. Issues regarding alcohol and other substances must be taken into account.

What if a location is inappropriate or uncomfortable for some students in the group? When I teach a book that deals with a specific social group or issue, I try to be aware of students for whom this topic is personal. No book or travel destination is the be all and end all. There are always alternatives.

Should an educator pick a travel destination that puts a student at potential risk? All travel involves some form of risk. Where is the line? On the continuum, I would want my children going on trips with the least possible risk. If an alterative exists that makes the trip more safe and comfortable for even one child without harming the others, why not take that alterative?

Would any of the players on the Highland Park girls’ basketball team be at risk in Arizona? Would they feel uncomfortable or feel anxious there? Would their families have worries, concerns, or misgivings about the trip? Should the coach and the district take any of these issues into account when choosing where to go?

If there is a suitable alterative to Arizona, why not go there? If the team can have as good an experience, and learn and play together in a place that does not pose these issues, wouldn’t that be a better choice?

Being a good teacher means taking good care of all students. Anxious kids don’t learn well. Distracted and worried kids don’t perform well in the classroom or on the court. Being a responsible educator means making sure kids are in an environment where learning- and playing basketball- can be the primary focus.

Many have been debating if it is appropriate for a school to make a political statement with a trip like this. School representatives have stated that their decision was not politically motivated. Politics have stolen the ball. The team and its needs should be the subject of the debate. If the debate over the Arizona location has shifted the focus that far off the court, then it is clearly not the best choice for these young people and this school.